My First Talk

 I am seriously slacking in the blogging department. Freya is now 16 months and I have no updated since her 9 month blog post... which I literally just posted. I am the worst these days.

Since that post, we have moved back to my hometown. We now have Willow half the month, sharing custody with her mother. We had a Halloween Party just for Willow. I started a second job with Miss Ruby's kids, an amazing literacy program. There has been a lot and I hope to be able to update this more often.

However, I wanted to pop-in and tell you guys (all 2 of you) that I gave my first talk in sacrament meeting this past Sunday. Bishop Holt got me, and to be honest, I was not nervous until 5 minutes before I had to talk to the front. I had been too busy the entire week before to be nervous. 

We were having the Halloween Party for Willow and I went ALL out. I was busy baking cookies and treats for these kids. Somethings turned out amazing, and some not so great, but I learned where I messed up and will correct it for the next time.

Any who, Bishop did me a HUGE favor but helping adjust these barstools I got for our apartment. They were a bit too tall for the counter, so he cut the legs down and sanded them for me. Then he asked me to give a talk and I felt like after that I couldn't say no. So I didn't. And I was mostly okay with that decision. 

He gave me my topic and I got to work. He did request I talk for 15 minutes, and while in a normal conversation I can't shut up, talking in front of a crowd for that long is NOT my strong suit. I did send him my talk ahead of time for approval to make sure it was good, because I have never given a talk in front of the whole church before (and LIVE stream as well.)

He gave me the go ahead and I was set. I did not sleep much, and was in the worst pain of my life all night and I was seriously contemplating calling him to tell him I couldn't do it. I mean, this was so awful; I'll spare you the details but it was equivalent to the pain of active birth... with no epidural. But I sucked it up and I went. About 5 minutes before I went up, Bishop texted me (he was at work) to tell me I will be great and to wish me luck. Thanks Bishop, now I am even more nervous!

It went well. I started off with a line I got from good ole' elder Peterson when he was assigned here. "I was once told by an elder that if I am giving a talk in church, I should start off with a joke or a lie... Well, I am not funny, so I am happy to be here!" (we all know that was a lie, because I am hilarious.)

It got some laughs and made it easier for me to continue. And it helped a little that Freya was being a goober and running from Alex. I was able to relax a little. The physical pain was still very much present but I made it through.

The amount of compliments I got was a little overwhelming. I feel like I am a decent writer but a terrible speaker. But I am glad it was enjoyed. It was hard to do for me, because even though I have been a member for like 5 years now? (Has it been that long? Maybe 4?) I still feel unqualified to speak in church to a group of people. 

I do try my hardest but like everyone else, I am only human. I very much make mistakes, I am not perfect and I goof up more than I care to admit. (But I will admit when I do.) I am glad I got that opportunity and maybe, just maybe, I will do it again.