Faith.

Faith used to not mean very much to me. I had long lost my faith in the church. I know that I will also lose faith in people, but I lost faith in the representatives of God in these churches. I lost faith in my family; it fell apart when we lost my grandfather. I was lost.

Ryan, Trent, Kevin, even Adam Oliver, as well as Marshall Dowell, a missionary I met twice on day transfers, had given me hope in faith once more. My hope had jumped ship with my faith. (Or maybe they got happy without me and ran off!) The point is, I was lost. I was on a sinking ship. I was questioning everything, my life, my choices, my thoughts. I couldn't keep up. My baptism confirmed my faith, and I won't say things have been smooth sailing, but they have been better. I have been happier.

Things I have been praying for, I have been getting answers. The hope I've been asking for, it's back. Now, I don't know everything, nor will I probably ever know everything/ I just know that doing this was the right decision for me. I might not be getting the things I want right now, but I know it's God's timing that I am getting them as I need them.

I've been learning about so many wonderful men and women in our church. The LDS church is huge. I can not wait to met more, and to learn more. One guy in particular, Deiter F Uchtdorf, he is just amazing. His talks he gives are full of love and inspiration. I've only read a couple, but I can't wait to read me.

The last thing I am leaving with you guys tonight is this, Uchtdorf said "Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith." And my baptism did just that, it made my doubts go away, and strengthened my faith. I am blessed to be with this church. I am blessed to have an amazing husband who doesn't full understand my decision, but supports me 100%. I am blessed to have the friends I do, the true ones who didn't leave. My faith is stronger.